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You know that feeling you get when you’re leaning back comfortably in your chair and thinking about how well things are going? Then, out of nowhere, you feel as though your heart jumps out of your chest and you are falling 100 feet? You’re able to catch yourself. Then, you look around to see if anyone saw you slip or witnessed you get so sacred that you almost screamed. But, you’re fine. You didn’t actually scream. You didn’t actually fall. That is what it’s like for me now, four years later after the loss of our son, Jake. My wife asked me to write something for Father’s Day and again, just like that, the chair slipped. See, it’s not Father’s Day, Christmas, or even Jake’s birthdays that are hard. It’s seeing a random boy with his dad. It’s a song. It’s a room that is too quiet. It’s the random moments that catch me off guard, and those times that the chair slips, just a bit. Continue reading from PALS guest contributor, Bret Hand's, "Feeling Like Falling: Life after Loss": https://pregnancyafterlosssupport.com/feeling-falling-life-after-loss/
I am a father who has lost a child. That makes Father’s Day a mixture of happiness and sadness. I have one living son, Noah, who at two and a half is the cutest bundle of curiosity and wonder. And I have one deceased son, Will, who if he were alive now would be almost four. I miss Will every day, but Father’s Day in particular is difficult. Father’s Day is a day to celebrate being Noah’s dad, but it’s also a day to remember Will. Almost four years of missing Will has raised questions about how to live that don’t have definite answers. One huge question I struggle with is: How do I reconcile the absolute joy that Noah brings with the pain of Will’s forever absence? I say there aren’t definite answers because things are always changing. Continue reading from PALS guest contributor, Darrell Paul's," Father’s Day after Loss": https://pregnancyafterlosssupport.com/fathers-day-after-loss/
As Father's Day Approaches And Loss Dad's Are Often Forgotten, Prepare For My Hubby To Be All Over My insta.... 😉 We Never In A Million Years Thought We Would Bury One Child, But It Happened Not Once But Three Times. I Honestly Don't Know How I Could Have Survived The Last 4 Years Without James. 💙 #babyloss #babydeath #childloss #childdeath #miscarriage #tfmr #incompetentcervix #lossfather #dadsgrievetoo #supportforeachother
Anonymous shares: Something very personal is being woven on my loom at the moment. When my daughter Rebecca was stillborn 2 days shy of 22 weeks, she was washed and returned to me in a minuscule white dress obviously handmade by some kind-hearted person who had probably walked a similar path before me. _ I had woven her a purple and turquoise blanket back when I first found out I was pregnant but all 28 cm and 310 g of her looked so lost in such a big blanket. _ Now 2 weeks post termination for medical reasons, it’s time for me to weave all my pain, my sorrow, my tears and my grief into something beautiful. I’m weaving tiny little baby blankets for other babies born too soon. My plan is to donate them back to the place who so graciously donated to us her tiny white gown and a memory box made of the same fabric so other parents can wrap and hold their babies. _ #IHadAMiscarriage #tfmr #stillborn #stillbirth #bornstill #pregnancyloss #lossmom #grief #loss #miscarriage // Art by @tactilematter.
Already thinking about when I can get back in shape... but always grateful for what my body is capable of doing. Even though I feel like a whale 🐳
There is an ache Where you should be. A longing For you which never quiets. My arms ache with the weight Of your absence; My heart breaks Again each morning, as I wake To find that you are Gone. . Life will continue (and isn’t that the saddest part?) It is an impossibility That the world still seems to be turning; That the seconds Keep on ticking Without you here. . But you can never be forgotten. . ... . You are woven into the patchwork of our story. We are forever changed For having loved The blessing That is you. . You, my darling boy; My small soldier, My fair-haired warrior, My eternal ruler: You are our son. . You shall never be lost. . 💙✨ . [excerpt from the poem I wrote for Findlay’s funeral] . . 📸 by @j_foulds_photography . . . . #ForFindlay #babylossawareness #stillbirth #bornstillbutstillborn #babyloss #childloss #miscarriageawareness #thisismymotherhood #weareallmums #tfmr #myson #babyboy #bigbrother #poetsofinstagram #poemstagram #wordstagram #onemissingmum
Get it together Northern Ireland! I hold a british passport. I am entitled to apply for an Irish passport. However living in NI I am not entitled to the same rights as a British woman & now an Irish woman. Where is the logic? Women in Northern Ireland are still unable to seek abortions for any other reason than extenuating circumstances where the mothers life is at risk. When I had my TFMR my paper work basically in the simplest form said if I continued with my pregnancy, I would be at risk of suicide. This was not the reason behind my termination. The only person being prioritised in MY CHOICE was MY CHILD. My daughter was unplanned, conceived while I was using a contraceptive responsibly. It was a failure based on medication I wasn’t told could interact with the effectiveness of my contraception. However, very quickly, she had a whole family very excited to meet her. 21 weeks in we were given our tragic news. 6 months after she was born we were given a very intricate description of abnormalities & potential reasons. I never set out to have an abortion. I never thought I would have one or need one, until I did. Trust your mothers, sisters, daughters, aunties, cousins & friends. Women are for the most part, more than capable of making decisions for their own bodies! All that said, I don’t support abortions as a means of contraception & that’s not what we’re asking to be legislated! #changenow #northernireland #weneedchange #womensrights #supportourrights #trustourwomen #prochoice #prochoiceisprolife #starttalking #awareness #abortion #termination #tfmr #tfmrireland @tfmr_ireland #helpwomen #theskyeiseverywhere
Our "Tips from a PAL Mom" this week deals with experiencing grief for your little one who died in that first year of parenting after PAL. A fellow PAL mama offers this insight: Honestly, grief is everywhere. It made every moment bittersweet. Holding my breathing rainbow reminded me of holding her still and silent sister. Getting her dressed, watching her explore her world...every moment was joy mixed with sadness. I think maybe the biggest kick in the gut was about three weeks in when I realized I wasn’t “fixed” and that I would never be. I thought there was something wrong with me because I couldn’t be overwhelmingly joyful about getting my rainbow. Looking back, I know there was some PPD in there as well. I guess my “advice” would be that it’s okay to feel happy and it’s okay to feel sad. And it’s okay to be both at the same time. 💕 ------------------------------ Thank you for sharing your experiences to help others, mamas.
Got this today. Super proud of being able to work alongside such a wonderful charity @sandscharity in memory of my eldest daughter ❤ #gonebutneverforgotten #mumtothree #angelmum #stillbirthandneonataldeath #stillbirth #stillbirthawareness #neonataldeath #premature #prematurity #tfmr #fetalabnormalities #miscarriage #eptopicpregnancy #babyloss #babydeath #40yearsofsands #bereavedparents