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image by Eufemia (@eufemiasfood) with caption : "15.08.2018
Ok, today I feel hopeless. 
Yesterday I thought I was a fat and ugly pig, and today I think I'm pretty. I do " - 1846671716437668886
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15.08.2018 Ok, today I feel hopeless. Yesterday I thought I was a fat and ugly pig, and today I think I'm pretty. I do not know who I am. I want to lose weight... from tomorrow, I start a diet of 1000 calories. *zdjęcie kawy z maka xd*

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Good eveeeee wonderfuls! 🌷🌷🌷 the weather is grim and aside from abysmal body image and the contradicting EXTREME hunger. I am fine and dandy and still up for kicking anorexias shitty ass. 💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻 info on when extreme hunger goes away would be helpful. I have come along way. And I am not about to step back now. Not when I am finally getting my life on track! So todays !! BREAKFAST: @arla.uk skyr lemon protein yog, strawbs, banana and @rudehealth nutty granola. CHOCOBAR WEDNESDAY : starbar ! I havent ever tried one of those until now! It was epic! LUNCH : pb amd cherry jam toastie with a @nutmegandhive mango yog. I was super hunger so I made another tpadtie after I ate this hahahhaa i feel so bad though. AFTERNOON SNACK: was a monster smoothie woth hemp protein honey berries and coconut milk. And a @grazedotcom honey and seed bite. I was starving after the dog walk. DINNER : post gym was honey siracha salmon @sriracha_fg my love. With nooodles and veggies with some tamari soy sauce. NIGHT SNACK: i had early because hunger. Was a hit choco with @nature_valley almond butter dunker. I am really struggling mentally today. I have had some comments on my quads and how impressive they are and the eating disorder part of my brain is translating it to "your huge and disgusting" so its really difficult for me to accept my self atm. I look at my arms and the muscles now scare me into thinking I'm just disgusting and huge. When its just muscles i have worked really hard for... Hopefully tomorrow is better mentally for me. Struggling with alot of pain and stiffness with the rheumatiod so thats making my self worth plumit as well. I will beat this.         #edfam  

🌻  J O S I   🌻 (@my.ride.to.happiness) Instagram Profile Photo my.ride.to.happiness

🌻 J O S I 🌻

image by 🌻  J O S I   🌻 (@my.ride.to.happiness) with caption : "Today i really want to be honest to you!
My particular brand of anxiety is “high-functioning,” meaning that my symptoms " - 1846662138351289413
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Today i really want to be honest to you! My particular brand of anxiety is “high-functioning,” meaning that my symptoms are masked in overdoing, overthinking, and overperforming. for a long time, i didn’t recognize that working so hard and caring so much were wearing me down. they seemed like positive traits, not symptoms of a disorder, which is what makes it so difficult to spot. but with high-functioning anxiety, no success is ever enough to quiet the fear. behind every perfect presentation and flawless project was a mountain of worry. i was plagued with guilt that i hadn’t done enough, or hadn’t done it soon enough, or hadn’t done it well enough. i lived for the approval of others and spent countless hours trying to perform at an impossible standard that my own anxiety had created. no matter how hard i worked or how proud i was of my achievements, the anxious part of my brain would scrutinize, criticize, and patronize me. and, worst of all, i suffered in silence. i didn’t tell my friends or family. my fear of judgement and misunderstanding was too big. the only way i knew how to deal with my symptoms was to try a little harder and never slow down. But than...I passed my A-Level Exam in June. And now everything is much easier!!! But to be honest I‘m afraid of the future😬 just because I start going to university in October... #edfam

image by Tay (@tay.recovers) with caption : "Hey lovelies❤️ I just wanted to update...I’ve been struggling AF so I may be going back to iop. Which sucks so much but " - 1846659188488803454
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Hey lovelies❤️ I just wanted to update...I’ve been struggling AF so I may be going back to iop. Which sucks so much but I think I need the extra support. It’s too easy to not follow my meal plan at home, and no one says anything, I still look healthy, so I’m slipping unnoticed. My family doesn’t even know I’m considering doing iop. I feel so much shame for having to need treatment again. Idk what I’m doinggggg. I need to be back in school as I only have 1 yr left, but I have to pay for it myself😭..Anyway, that was a depressing rant but I’m gonna try to hang with a friend or something instead of sleeping the day away. fam

image by R (@resa_restarts) with caption : "My parents took me to a nutritionist today. My mother wants me to gain weight under supervision of a nutritionist becaus" - 1846658796690423651
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My parents took me to a nutritionist today. My mother wants me to gain weight under supervision of a nutritionist because she thinks I don't know what to eat to gain. I know exactly how much I need to eat to gain weight - the problem is: do I really wanna eat right now? Do I wanna gain right now? It just depends on my mood. The nutritionist did a body analysis which was fun. Now I know my basal metabolic rate and my body fat and water percentages. Had a cinnamon bun for snack. Lunch was sweet potato mash with prawns which is one of my favourite foods ever! 🍠🍤 I had a Bounty bar after lunch. This was unplanned but I did it for my sister 👯. It makes me happy to see that she is happy ☺️. Dinner was the same as lunch and I had a pastry for dessert. I'm stuffed but okay with it 🙃 • • • I still don't know what therapy to choose. My mother thinks that nutrition therapy is the right thing, my father wants me to go inpatient, my doctor thinks outpatient therapy would be the best. And I? I don't know. I mean, I'm still the same person, but everyone treats me so different than before. I was never completly happy nor completly sad. I just lived my life without seeing any purpose in my existence. I always knew that someday in the future something needs to change. Is now the time to change? Maybe I don't wanna change. I don't feel ready yet, but what If I miss the train? I'm stuck here. But maybe this is my place to be in life. I'm afraid. I don't know what to do 😣. I feel like no one can help me because no one knows my true self. They all think to know what's best for me. Maybe they are right. But do I even know who I am? I'm so so sorry for all the negative thoughts lately, but writing my problems down helps me to cope with them. What are your coping techniques? I'm curious to know 😊.

✨Alexandra|sweden🇸🇪 (@alexandrasrecovery) Instagram Profile Photo alexandrasrecovery

✨Alexandra|sweden🇸🇪

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S N A C K! Kvällsmellis blir havregurt med pauluns hallon & kakao granola, frusna bär, pumpa kärnor, jordnötssmör och ett äpple. Super gott!🙏🏽 Hoppas ni kan sova gott alla! Ni är så bra!✨ LoveYou💗 〰️ 〰️ #edfam #

thin.biologist (@thin.biologist) Instagram Profile Photo thin.biologist

thin.biologist

image by thin.biologist (@thin.biologist) with caption : "Nabend. Es folgt das neuerdings notwendige [Werbung] wegen (leider) selbstgekaufter Markenware😅🤷🏻‍♂️.
Manchmal hab ich e" - 1846657528324602676
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Nabend. Es folgt das neuerdings notwendige [Werbung] wegen (leider) selbstgekaufter Markenware😅🤷🏻‍♂️. Manchmal hab ich echt Lust auf Ersatzprodukte; bin teilweise echt so überrascht, dass mir nix anderes übrig bleibt als meinen Hut vor den Lebensmittelchemikern zu ziehen 🤔. Ich kann übrigens auch berichten, dass meine Rauchmelder gut funktionieren *hust* 😅🤦🏻‍♂️. . Ansonsten war die Geburtstagsfeier meiner Oma mit Verwandten schön und entspannt. Kaffee und Kuchen hätte zwar besser laufen können aber dadurch, dass ich mir einfach selbst was fleischloses zum Grillen mitgenommen habe gabs keine unangenehme Überraschung beim Abendessen 😬. Ich wünsche noch einen schönen Abend🌆. . fam